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Archive for August, 2011

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Man Kills Wife With Homemade Missile

RUSSIAN authorities were today probing the freak death of a woman killed by a homemade missile launched by her husband.

The victim was looking on as her aviation-enthusiast spouse assembled his makeshift rocket in a field, RIA Novosti reported.

But the launch when horribly wrong when the missile blasted off and veered toward her, striking the woman in the head.

Authorities in Vologda, northwest Russia, said the wife was rushed to the hospital but died soon after the accident, which happened earlier this month.

“During the launch, the model rocket veered off course and hit his wife in the head. The woman died in the hospital,” investigators said today.

The 42-year-old husband, who works for an aviation company, could face up to two years in prison for manslaughter, the state-owned Russian news agency said.news.com.au

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TODAY’S CHUCKLE

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HOW MOSES GOT THE 10 COMMANDMENTS

God went to the Arabs and said,

‘I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.’

The Arabs asked, ‘What are Commandments?’
And the Lord said, ‘They are rules for living.’

‘Can you give us an example?’

‘Thou shall not kill.’

‘Not kill? We’re not interested..’

So He went to the Blacks and said, ‘I have Commandments.’

The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said,
‘Honor thy Father and Mother.’

‘Father? We don’t know who our fathers are.
We’re not interested.’

Then He went to the Mexicans and said,
‘I have Commandments.’

The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said ‘Thou shall not steal.’

‘Not steal? We’re not
interested.’

Then He went to the French and said,
‘I have Commandments.’

The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, ‘Thou shall not
commit adultery.’

‘Sacre bleu!!! Not commit adultery? We’re not interested.’

Finally, He went to the Jews and said,
‘I have Commandments..’

‘Commandments?’ They said, ‘How much are they?’

‘They’re free.’

‘We’ll take 10.’

******

There. That, should piss off just about everybody!!

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The English language has some wonderfully anthropomorphic collective nouns for the various groups of animals.

We are all familiar with a HERD of cows, a FLOCK of chickens, a SCHOOL of fish and a GAGGLE of geese.

However, less widely known is a PRIDE of lions, a MURDER of crows (as well as their cousins the rooks and ravens), an EXALTATION of doves and, presumably because they look so wise, a PARLIAMENT of owls.

Now consider a group of Baboons. They are the loudest, most dangerous, most obnoxious, most viciously aggressive and least intelligent of all primates.  And what is the proper collective noun for a group of baboons?  Believe it or not ……. a CONGRESS!

Guess that pretty much explains the things that come out of Washington!

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SMALL TOWN DEMOCRACY

The Town Council of Gould, Ark. (pop. 1,100), voted in July to make it illegal for its citizens to form “groups” without written permission from the council. (The mayor and the city council are feuding over the budget, and the council, attempting to stifle lobbying by a group supporting the mayor, has taken down all “groups” — except that the ordinance appears to blatantly violate the First Amendment.) [New York Times]

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Woman Powered Helicopter Sets

World Record For Longest Flight

University of Maryland students flew past a world record after the human-powered helicopter Gamera hovered more than twelve seconds inside the campus’ Reckord Armory in early July.

Pilot and biology student Judy Wexler set the world record for longest human-powered flight by a woman. She also broke the national record for longest human-powered flight

The previous national record was only four seconds. Gamera set this milestone earlier this year inside the university’s Comcast Center.

A twelve-second flight was completed on July 12. Gamera had crashed the day before, forcing the engineering team to spend all night repairing the helicopter.

Professor Inderjit Chopra says Gamera is continuously modified and repaired. He knows more improvements are to come, with another flight expected within the next six months.

The goal is to win the Sikorsky Prize, a $250,000 reward given by the American Helicopter Society. In order to win, a human-powered helicopter must fly at least thirty seconds, hover at least three meters above ground, and not drift outside a ten-meter square.

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Deputies: Sex offender at school  

A sex offender who was sentenced to at least seven years in prison for attempted rape and kidnapping in Catawba County in 2005 was on school grounds in Lincolnton last week, according to Lincoln County deputies.

Thomas Joseph Berghello, 38, of 3360 Sorrells Baxter Road in Cherryville, is accused of being on Lincoln Charter School’s property at 133 Eagle Nest Road on Tuesday.

The suspect was served a warrant for a felony charge of a sex offender on child premises and was booked in the Harven A. Crouse Detention Center under a $5,000 secured bond according to the Sheriff’s Office.

Berghello’s warrant for arrest stated that “the named defendant unlawfully, willingly and feloniously” was on the school’s grounds. However, the suspect has since been released from the Lincoln County jail.

He was also convicted of felony forgery in Caldwell County in March 2005 according to public records on the North Carolina Department of Correction’s Web site and was released from prison in November 2010 after serving time for the second-degree sex crimes.

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THOMAS J BERGHELLO

Last Known Address: 3360 SORRELLS BAXTER RD, CHERRYVILLE, NC 28021

 

Race:             W                                               

Sex:   Male                           Eyes:             BROWN

Height:             5’6                               Hair:             BROWN

Weight             250 lbs.                             Age/DOB:             8/20/1972

 

Offense or Statute

Offense/Statute: ATTEMPTED RAPE OR ATTEMPTED SEX OFFENSE (1ST,2ND DEGREE) Date Convicted: 12 January 2005

Offense/Statute: KIDNAPPING AGAINST A MINOR (1ST,2ND) Date Convicted: 12 January 2005

 

Alias(es)

 

BERGHELLO,THOMAS JOSEPH

BERGHELLO,TOM

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